MSU Extension 4-H Adulting 101

Okay. Welcome to the first session of Adulting 101 for 2025. My name is Janice Zerbe. I'm an Extension Educator with MSU Extension, and our topic tonight is decreasing stress with mindfulness. We have two presenters for this evening. We have Darian Wilkerson and Kea Norrell-Aitch. I always mispronounce her last name, and I'll let her introduce herself. But if you have questions throughout, please put them in the chat, and then I'm going to turn it over to Darian and Kea and they can introduce themselves. Thank you, Janice. Yes. Hello, everyone. So, welcome to the Adulting 101 series of Decreasing Stress with Mindfulness. Like you heard earlier, my name is Darian Wilkerson. I am also a MSU Extension Educator within Healthy Living Emotional Wellness is the focus area, doing a lot of work within that space, training and workshops in the community. Then I will pass it off to my colleague Kea to introduce herself. Good evening, everyone. My name is Kea Norrell- Aitch. Happy to be here, Educator with MSU Extension in the same area of 4-H Healthy Living with a focus on mental health and emotional wellness. So looking forward to the time we have together this evening. Okay. Thank you, Kea. We will move forward into the presentation. This slide is talking about our equal opportunity that we do not discriminate at all depending on race, color, national origin, sex gender, gender identity, as MSU Extension, as an employer. Letting that know, letting everyone know about that for that slide. Okay. Quick agenda. For today's agenda, letting you know what we're going to be talking about. We're going to be reviewing quickly what our learning objectives are. We're going to be going into segment one, which is mindfulness. We're going to be talking a little bit about segment two, which is what is stress. Then we're going to get more into Segment 3, which is talking about mental health challenges in teens. Segment four is talking about some of those coping skills when it comes to those challenges and teens, and then the ending will be a quick survey. Just let us know as presenters how we did, what we can improve on, and so on. Okay. So we will move into the learning objectives. For today, we're going to be developing deeper understanding towards mindfulness practices related to stress management, explore various mental health challenges and their signs and symptoms, and then learning some healthy coping skills related to stress and various mental health challenges. So we're going to be talking a little bit about everything and hopefully we can help everyone learn a little bit more about how mindfulness and stress really go together and what we can do to really reduce some of this stuff in our day to day life. Okay. I will kick it over to Kea here as we get into What is mindfulness? Okay, so we like to start off with a fun video. Who has ever seen Kung Fu Panda, any of the Kung Fu Panda movies? So if you can raise your hand or put it in the chat, I see some hands going up and some thumbs up. Okay. Okay, great. So there are some cool messages within Kung Fu Panda, and one stood out to me that talks about mindfulness. So we're going to show you a video that's going to kick off the presentation to get us in the mindset of mindfulness. So we're going to pull that up now and hope everyone can see this wonderful video. ok " I understand. You eat when you are upset. Upset? I'm not upset. Why why won't would you think I'm upset? So why are you upset? I probably sucked more today than anyone in the history of Kung fu, in the history of China in the history of sucking. Probably. In the five. Man, you should have seen them. They totally hate me. Totally. How's Shifu ever gonna turn me into the dragon warrior? I mean, I'm not like the five. I've got no claws, no wings, no venom. Even Mantis has those thingies Maybe I should just quit and go back to making noodles. Quit, don't quit. Noodles. Don't noodles. You are too concerned with what was and what will be. There's a saying. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present. Okay, what did you think about that? Outside of the noodles part, which was fun. What did you think about how that relates to mindfulness? And you can put it in the chat. I'm going to ask a lot of questions, so please utilize the chat. Very good. Okay. Thank you. Being mindful of the day, great. Live in the now. Awesome. That's exactly what I was looking for. Don't hold on to the past. Right. So these are all practices of mindfulness. Mindfulness in a sense, in a few words, is really living in the present. We all have to plan for the future, but not being so involved in planning for the future that you missed out on a present moment. I actually heard something on the way here that says, you know, so many of us are in the midst of our phones all the time, looking at screens that we miss opportunities to engage with people, with our family, and our friends. So a huge piece of mindfulness is being present in the moment and enjoying that moment. So we're going to move on to the seven principles of mindfulness and you see them here. The first one is do not judge yourself. So a part of mindfulness is being kind to yourself and thinking about how would you treat your best friend and ensuring that you treat yourself like that. So you're not judging yourself, you're giving yourself grace. The second one is to have patience in the process that we're not so much focused on the future and the past, but we're present in the process. Now, don't get me wrong. Planning for the future is important, but living in the moment is important as well. The third one, it's okay that it's hard at first. A lot of things that we try can be difficult at first, but we have to keep trying usually with time and practice, it gets a little easier. Trust yourself and your feelings. Think about that gut feeling. If you ever had that gut feeling about something or someone, trust those feelings. That's a part of mindfulness as well. Do not strive for perfection. Just be. We can't be perfect in all areas. We can master some areas and be good at some things, but we don't have to be perfect. We may make mistakes and then accept how you are feeling. Acknowledge your feelings and sometimes say, This is how I'm feeling right now because it may be how you're feeling, but it may not feel that way forever. And then the last one, let go of assumptions. Assumptions of how people feel about us and assumptions that we may have about others. These are very important practices of mindfulness and you can screenshot this if you want, so that you can remember it for later. Okay. ( back ground noise) So how can mindfulness help our mental health? Mindfulness brings a lot of awareness to our emotions. Slowing down a little bit to take inventory of how you're feeling. We'll talk about this a little bit more coming up. Okay. Okay. Okay, sorry. I was other things, conversations going on around me. So being aware of how you're feeling. So let's say you have a headache one day and you are trying to decide, Oh, let me take some Tylenol or something like that. And then you just have to put a little bit more practice in, uh, why do I have this headache? Am I feeling stressed right now? Am I feeling overwhelmed? What's going on in the present moment? And then acknowledging those emotions without judgment. And this reminds us that unpleasant thoughts and situations are temporary. They may come into our minds, but most times they don't last forever. It also allows space to slow down to engage in healthy coping skills. We have to ensure that we are being healthy as we are working through emotions and other challenges that we may experience. Okay. Now it's time to utilize the chat again. What is stress? Like how would you define stress? If you could put stress in your own words, how would you define it? (waiting) Alright, I'm not seeing anything yet. Okay, a real pain. Thank you. I see one comment. A real pain. Anxiety, being overwhelmed. Okay. Overwhelming pressure. Yes, I see pressure again, physical and mental, a lack of control over the present or future situations. Something that burdens me and overwhelms me. Torture. These are some good definitions. Stress to me. Okay, hold on. I lost it and moved the rope, stress to me is not being able to concentrate or focus on one thing. I agree. That makes me stress too. I'm being filled with a bunch of things that you can't handle, a normal response to challenges or changes in life. Okay. I like that one. That one is pretty positive, Wendy, thank you for that. So all of these definitions are correct because stress is whatever you define it as and it can be different for different people. But the thing is, we have to determine how do we process stress and how do we deal with it so that it doesn't turn into chronic stress. Let's talk about a little bit more about stress. So I mentioned headaches as an example as an indicator of stress, but stress can show up in our body and our emotions in so many different ways. So you see these 3, excuse me, four categories here that outline stress in your body and your emotions. So in your emotions, stress could deal with feelings of sadness or depression. Stress can deal with feelings of being overwhelmed like you've already defined. Stress can affect your sleeping habits, your eating habits. It can increase your sleep or decrease your sleep. And then you see the physical. These are the things we don't like to talk about. But stress can affect how often you go to the restroom, if you go to the restroom and if you may have sweaty palms or chest pains, even shoulder stress. Like when I get stressed, I get tightness in my shoulders. So the important thing is to do a body scan from time to time and identify if you are feeling any of these things, whether they're physical or emotional and then try to pinpoint what is causing them. Now, it's one thing if you have an injury or something like that, but it could be stress. This is a piece of mindfulness, too. So slowing down enough to say, Hey, did I snap at my younger brother or did I snap at my friend because I'm stressed or is something else going on. Okay. I see a comment. Sometimes my shoulder knows I'm stressed before I do. I agree. That's a great point, Melinda. I can agree with that. I think my shoulders probably know before I do, as well. So thank you for that comment. So the point is that we pay attention to our bodies and how we respond to stress so that we can determine what's going on in that time. I can relate to a lot of these. Let me see. I saw the comment. I can relate to a lot of the symptoms on the screen. Thank you for acknowledging that. I hope that you're paying attention when you're experiencing those to kind of pinpoint what's the stressor, so that then you can try to work to decrease it. Good conversation. Thank you for that participation. So let's talk about what's stressing you in your life. I probably can name a few things, but you would do it better. What kind of things are stressing you in your life right now? Could it be school or thinking about a new job, family life. Okay. Okay. I see someone said career. Yes. Housing, too. We don't talk about that often. Like, housing can be stressful. Where am I going to live? You know, is it safe? What am I going to pay? Aging elders. That is a great point. Thank you for that, Maggie. That's another thing that we don't talk about. Financial anxiety, yes. Wanting to get a new job, all these things can cause stress in our lives, no matter how old you are. So again, thinking about how you can incorporate mindfulness when you are feeling those stressors. And we're going to talk about that more, too. An overload of work. Yes. Thank you for sharing those things. Not enough sleep. Yes, 'cause you have to work. Okay, there's agreement there. All right. So here are some stressors for teens. And then adults, we would take it a step further that some of these things can still play a part, but in a different way. So the expectations could be if you are the parent. And then you have to think about childcare. For your little one, you have to think about where they'll go when you're working. Oh, and I see somebody added trauma. Yes, we talk a lot about trauma. Trauma can cause a lot of stress as well, past trauma and current trauma. Um, so other things if you're in school. So say if you're a teen, it could be high school. If you're graduated from high school, it could be college, it could be trade school, it could be a variety of different schools that, stages of schools that can cause stress. And then changes in your body, how about we add to that injuries or ailments that we may experience that could cause stress in our bodies. Self image and self esteem can affect anyone at any point in age. And then family, I see somebody put death and divorce. Yes, we don't talk about how grief affects us as a stressor or trauma as someone mentioned. Moving or changing schools because maybe you have to move away from your closer friends because you find a better apartment or something like that. These are all possible stressors of teens and young adults. Oh, driving in snow. Oh, my goodness, Keisha, thank you for mentioning that. I think Darin mentioned early on that we are also mental health professionals outside of our Extension job. I see that a lot with clients that I work with that have stress about driving in the snow or the rain. So thank you for acknowledging that, and it looks like Wendy is in agreement. Being around unknown people, yes. That can be a stressor or cause some anxiety, social anxiety. So thank you for acknowledging all these things. All right. Let's move on. Okay, so when does healthy stress? I think somebody mentioned that healthy I'm using quotation marks, but you can't see my fingers. But healthy stress or normal stress, when does it become unhealthy? Normal stress could be starting a new job or starting college or something like that. But then when it turns into unhealthy stress, that's when we should be concerned. Now we're thinking about the times it's lasting for more than two weeks and you have the symptoms that we talked about. You have the headaches or the stomach aches, the sweaty palms and sleepless nights and things like that, or your appetite is changing. These are when you should be more aware and take so that you might want to reach out maybe first to a family member or a friend and chat about some things that are going on and then decide if you might want to reach out to a mental health professional to get the support that you might need. But the first step is identifying that something is going on because sometimes we just breeze through life and we just go to the next thing and to the next thing, and then next thing we know we have this chronic back pain that we've been ignoring for weeks and months. But it could be the source of a stressor. So I see a few comments in the chat. So thank you for that. All right. Let's move on. Darien, you just remind me where you're picking up so you can just pick up when it's your turn. So what happens if stress is not acknowledged or addressed? What do you think? You have a clue right here. And you can put it in the chat. What happens if stress is not addressed? Yeah. Freak outs? Yeah. So we can call those panic attacks. Illness, mentally and physically, yes. Yelling. Absolutely. You can get out of control, you can panic, you can develop anxiety or depression. It'll get worse. Isolation. You all are awesome. You have all the answers. Yes, it becomes a bigger issue. All these things are things that can happen if the stress is not addressed. But you see here again, that's your clue that some type of crisis is going to happen if it's not addressed. I like that too. Burnout. Burnout happens to all of us at some point if we don't acknowledge the stress. Thank you for those. All right. So as we move on, we're going to start moving into the mental health piece of stress. And if stress is not addressed, it can turn into mental health challenges, mainly depression and anxiety, as you see mentioned here and a lot of people put in the chat. So we want to be as proactive as possible to equip you with some tools to utilize if you start feeling this way or if you're already feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Okay. Excuse me. Thank you, Kea. Okay. So we're going to shift into more of that conversation and topic, talking more about those mental health challenges in teens, in particular, depression and anxiety. I guess it doesn't really need to really remain in the teen sector. This can really be anyone who's navigating life when it comes to stress and what's going on. But we are going to be placing that attention in those two topics. We're going to watch a quick video talking a little bit about depression and just a little bit of what that even looks like. Let's start there and then we'll talk a little bit more about. In things, changes in appetite. It is estimated that 5% of adults experience depression. But because it is a mental illness, it is a little bit harder to understand than, let's say, having a cold. The key is to separate out depression from occasional feelings of sadness or stress. Almost everyone feels down once in a while, like when losing a job, having an argument, or even witnessing a stretch of bad weather. However, these feelings come and go. They respond to ongoing changes while depression tends to feel heavy and constant. At times, it can be difficult to identify depression in someone as it is a disorder defined by thoughts, behaviors, and feelings. But there are some common symptoms of depression, such as prolonged periods of having no motivation or interest in things, changes in appetite, feeling worthless or guilty, sleeping either too much or too little, low energy, and difficulty concentrating, avoiding social interactions or recurring thoughts of self harm or death. Those who have experienced depression might have heard comments like, snap out of it, brighten up already. Go and do something about it. However, it is important to remember that depression is a disorder with a biological basis, along with psychological and social implications. It is not simply a weakness that somebody can get over or laziness that one can shrug off. Depression seldom gets better without treatment and may get even worse. Fortunately, there are many different ways of treating depression, such as therapy, medication, lifestyle changes, joining a support group, or at times simply confiding in a trusted friend or a family member. Although there is no quick fix for depression, the effort is completely worth it, and you may come out of it, perhaps even stronger. For more information on depression, as well as treatment options, please visit www.psychiatry.org. Okay. It is. So just keeping on that topic, right? So what we're hearing when it comes to a lot of different emotions and mental health challenges, we all are going to experience some levels of sadness, some levels of anxiety. That's not a bad thing, but once it becomes a chronic feeling or state of being, that's when it becomes harmful for our day to day life, and how it can impact our relationships, our jobs, what we need to do. And that's when we need to start to become curious as to why these things even happen. So as we're navigating and talking more about depression, we need to be mindful in recognizing the signs and symptoms. As you heard in the video, depression has various different signs, and those symptoms. So lack of motivation, you tend to socially withdraw. There's various different things that can come about when it comes to depressed mood. As we're talking about stress, when stress is not dealt with over time, it can feel very crippling and it can feel very hard to navigate, which can cause a very heavy weight to us and it can cause low mood and lack of motivation, and it feels like we can't get anything done. So I feel like all of us to some degree probably can feel that to a degree, right? So it's very important to recognize what are some of these coping skills we can do if we are in a position of having depressed mood. Okay? So I just wanted to bring up again some of what those signs and symptoms look like for depression. You know, having issues with sleeping, losing interest or pleasure in things that we typically like. The list goes on. Okay. So shifting into the topic of anxiety, just a couple of things when you think of anxiety, the biggest thing I try to summarize anxiety is that yet again, it can be a positive, but anxiety can be very crippling. I always encourage people to think of anxiety as an alarm system in our body and it's trying to indicate a threat, an external threat in our environment. And it's trying to protect us from that thing. And it can be anything. It can be a person, it can be a situation, it could be a test coming up, it can be a bill that's due. It can be we're out driving a car, we're having a fear that the cars going to hit whatever it is. Anxiety is trying to give us immediate attention, high levels of attention to an external potential threat. But if it's not managed or taken care of, it can really be crippling, right? So you have to recognize what are my symptoms? What are the things that come up for me? So for this slide, here are some of these symptoms that we can talk about restlessness, hot flashes, sudden trembling, dizziness, chest pain, shortness of breath. These are some of the symptoms when it comes to anxiety. But I'm definitely curious, please use the chat for this. Does anyone have any relatability to any of these symptoms? Can anyone put in the chat any of these symptoms that stand out to you that you have gone through yourself? Does it make this real for a second. So many, insomnia. Yeah. Yeah. All of them. Yeah. Yeah. Too many. A good number of them, yeah. Yeah. So again, right? So even a hand raised. Yeah. So again, the list goes on. We all have gone through so many of these symptoms. So it's really important to recognize how do we navigate this? If we know we can't avoid it, if we know trying to avoid it makes our symptoms even more exacerbated. We need to know some of these coping skills. What do we do to navigate these things, right? So we're going to shift more into that here in a second. Segment 4: Coping skills. What do we do? So I wanted to start backwards and then go back to anxiety and depression that we were talking about. Stress and mindfulness, that's the biggest things that we're talking about, right? You started off with this topic of stress and mindfulness. So when you're in an innate sense of stress, a couple of things that we can do to help reduce those feelings of stress. This doesn't cover everything, but a couple of key things you can do deep breathing, right? And this is intentional deep breathing. So really breathing in through your nose, and having a deep inhale for roughly 3 to 4 seconds, and then you're going to hold it for 3 to 4 seconds, breathe out for 3 to 4 seconds. And then pause for 3 to 4 seconds and do that cycle again and again. In the therapy world or clinical world, we call it box breathing or square breathing. I'm wondering if everyone has recognized that term before. But deep breathing can help reset your heart rate because when we get stressed or we get angry, our heart rate starts to beat really fast and that causes everything to go haywire in our body. So to get to get back into sync, we have to regulate our heart rate again. The best way to do that is through our breathing. Deep breathing is one. Kea brought up earlier body scanning. Body scanning is really just closing your eyes and trying to track where is the stress stored in my body. Different parts of your body can indicate different things in your life. Kea brought up shoulder stress. Sometimes shoulder stress can indicate carrying a lot of responsibility in your day to day life. So maybe delegating in your life may be a thing, maybe something to think about. But it's something to consider as you're navigating what's going on in my body and you just start to release some of that tension in that region of your body. So body scanning can be something that you can engage in. Simply watching is another mindfulness tool. Really what's happening in that state is that you're recognizing and catching those negative thoughts that come up when you're stressed and you're just acknowledging its existence, but you're not attaching any meaning to it. Because once we attach meaning to our thoughts, that's when things can start to get out of hand. We're just acknowledging its existence, we're letting it just flutter away. That's all we're doing. We're acknowledging it, and we're just letting it flutter away. So simply watching. It's really just watching our thoughts or imagining our thoughts being there, we're acknowledging that it's there, but it has no power or influence over my behavior. That's what we're doing with that. And then yoga is just another good outlet when it comes to stress management. It's another good way to get your body moving and engaged. It's another physical release. So there is stress and mindfulness for some coping skills there. Okay. Then going back to the topic of depression, there's a couple of things you can do, but a couple things you can do with depression is one is called behavioral activisation or opposite reaction. That's one thing to keep in mind, opposite reaction. With depression, it makes you want to go inward. Opposite reaction always telling you is to do the complete opposite of what you innately want to do. Let's say you want to stay in bed all day. Opposite reaction says we need to get out of bed. Let's say you don't want to get up and take a shower. Opposite reaction says we need to get up and at least brush our teeth, do some kind of self care, some kind of hygiene that day. You can start very small and then go to something big, but you have to try to do something, right? That's what opposite reaction is. Typically, you can have an accountability person, bring your friend in to support you with the opposite reaction. That could be one thing to do to help combat depression and having that social support. Saying yes to socializing, saying yes to hangouts can be very powerful and important. Leaning in on those existing friendships can be good too. So just never do anything alone. Always trying to bring in your support team. When it comes to that. And then when it comes to anxiety, there's a thing that we like to call cognitive restructuring, which is basically just challenging our thoughts. You do the same thing with depression, honestly. You're just basically putting all your thoughts on trial. Just to pretend you're in a courtroom in your mind and everything you're saying, you're just saying, is there evidence to support this? Is this true or not true? If so, why? You're just challenging your thoughts as much as you can, so you're not creating a bad habit of thinking in a negative way. So there's a couple questions you can ask yourself, right? Is my thought based on facts or feelings when it comes to anxiety? How would my best friend see this situation? How likely is it that my fear would come true? What's most likely to happen? And then the fifth one is, I call it time chunking. If this does come true, will it matter in a week? Will it matter in a month? Will it matter in a year? When you stretch it out over time, it starts to lose meaning and power and influence over you. You can tell yourself, well, this isn't going to matter in a month, why am I having so much emotional energy over this thing? You start to be able to rationalize a little bit better, right? So there's certain things and tricks you can think about when it comes to depression, anxiety, stress, and mindfulness as a whole, to get you out of these situations. Because we can't avoid emotions, we have to embrace these emotions, but we have to find the way in the tricks and the tools to get us through it. Okay. Okay. So that's what we have for you. We definitely have time for questions, and then we have a survey at the end. So we can definitely do the questions now and then we can put up the slide for the survey right before the ending. So if you have any questions, if you go ahead and put them in the chat, we'll do our best to get those answered at this time. Go ahead and type your question in. (waiting) So there's a question that says, My work causes me to be online a lot. How do I not be online so much? I can take that one. So our job causes us to be online a lot, too. So some things that I do and I know that help is making sure you take breaks. And I know that's easier said than done, but scheduling your breaks. And when you have a break, make sure you move. So walk around your house if you can. Walk outside. Even if it's for 5 minutes during the break, do some yoga, do some stretches during your break. Just get moving. I think moving is a key piece to ensure that you're not just staying still because eventually, if you're a sedentary, like for so long, you might develop some challenges with your back if your posture is not the best. So movement is a huge piece. Would you add to that, Darien? No. No Kea, I think you nailed it. I would say movement, have something embedded in your schedule that allows for that. So that is obviously you can't really go outside given the weather, but just having something that's allowing you to separate your work life and your home life. That's leaving having one room dedicated to work, but then other rooms or parts of your home can just be free and you can just roam around and do other things. That could be powerful as well. Just dedicate a certain area to work so you can separate it better. There is another question it says, when does medication come into play? So I can start this and then Kea can add on to it. I feel like medications dependent on the person. So if the person is open to having a discussion, we just kind of talk about the intensity of the symptoms. How long have they been present? What's been going on your life. But I would say really just examining how long the symptoms have been there, the intensity of them. Is it causing issues in your personal life, your professional life, your relationship life, in looking at those kind of areas, and then you can make a good judgment from that point to see if it's necessary. And then I'll add working with a mental health professional, making sure you have a clinician that you trust, and then seeing what other things you can try first if you determine you might want to try an exercise regimen or changing your diet or making sure you have those social connections and things like that. Trying different things as opposed to just saying, I'm going to go into medication right off. Then the last thought is pairing medication with a counseling or therapy to ensure that it's two components because usually cognitive behavioral therapy is a good option to match with medication, and it helps hold you accountable and allows you an opportunity to process some things that you may be experiencing. Absolutely Kea. Yeah. Most places will not allow you to get medication typically without having some kind of ongoing services in general. So it's a good rule of thumb to have ongoing treatment, cognitive therapy in particular. But yeah, well said. There is another question. It says, Can you ever get away from having mental illnesses? ( Pause) Well, I feel like That's a good question. I don't know if that's the main goal. I think just trying to find ways to navigate our emotions, right? Menal illness in general, I mean, you can't always because there's a biological component to it at times too. So in some cases, probably not. But there's so much going into the context of someone developing a mental health challenge, that I would say that shouldn't even be a focus of running away from it. It should be, this is my situation, this is what I'm feeling, this is what I'm experiencing. How do I manage it? And that typically means coping skills, that typically means ongoing therapy, et cetera, right? But Kea, do you have anything to add to that? No, I'm in full agreement. I think it kind goes to the mindfulness piece too, being present, acknowledging what's going on, and trying to make sure you have the best support, but not necessarily looking at it like Darien and said, trying to get away from it, but addressing it directly and making sure you have the best support system for it. Its not the end. I just want to add that there is hope when you have a mental health challenge, you can live a productive life. But treatment and support is very important. We have a couple other questions. The first one is what is one way to calm yourself down when you're caught in a lot of drama? I'll start with boundaries, but boundaries are a key piece that may try to decrease that potential for drama, and then maybe we can move on to some techniques that we talked about on the slide that had to do with deep breathing and yoga and things like that, mindfulness practices like taking a walk or walking away from the drama. Wonderful The next question is, how do I plan ahead for the present without thinking too much of the future for anxiety? (no sound) That's a good question. I feel like like we said, all emotions are good and bad. There's anxiety there because you care. You can't really take away that anxiety at all. You can fine tune it like you're trying to look for. The best thing you can do is just tell yourself, give yourself kudos you're even planning anything, Vision boarding is a good idea, good strategy. You're just going to chunk it. Maybe you're just going to devote X amount of time in a week or in a day to dedicate to your future, whatever that looks like. Then you're telling yourself, outside of those hours or schedule I have, I'm going to do other hobbies and self care for myself. So I don't get so self absorbed into that thing. But I would just say overall, yeah, you're doing right by thinking about your future. But I would just say, give yourself a strict schedule and then have some good other practices around it, that might help offset some of that. Kea, anything you would add? That is a challenging question. I appreciate that one. It's really getting our wheels turning. So let me reread it. How do I plan ahead for the present without thinking too much of the future for anxiety? We all have to plan for the future. But again, having to focus on the present as much as possible. And then how about setting goals? I think that's a good option is to set some short term and long term goals so that then you can evaluate how you're doing and acknowledge your progress. So then hopefully that can decrease some anxiety. So I would incorporate some goal setting. Okay, we have another question it says, how do you talk to a person into getting help, especially if they're crossing boundaries with you? ( pause) You all have great questions. That is a good one. I'll just reiterate how important boundaries are. And sometimes setting boundaries takes practice to set them and then to enforce them. I definitely takes practice. I would start with that and then moving on to the friend of how they need if they need help or support, maybe you can give them, we're going to send out a resource list after this session. So maybe you can share the resource list with them, or maybe you can tell them, you know, if I get overwhelmed, I talk to my mom or I talk to a counselor and normalize talking about challenges. Then that may help um, to get some help. And then depending on what kind of help they need, there's 988 is an option is to call or text 988 if they need help with a mental health professional. And then that operator who answers will connect them to a mental health professional. So I think the bottom line is normalizing, getting help. Okay. That's the end of the questions for now, Darien, do you want to put the survey in the chat or share it on the screen? Then what we will do is since this is recorded, we will have it closed captioned, and then we will put it on our website and then it will probably be a week or so and then we will send out the recording with the resources to everyone that has registered for Adulting 101 Take a few minutes to do the survey. The QR code is on the screen. Thank you, everyone.